BDSM lost its kick a couple of years into our relationship.
Toby and I had always been bored with everything vanilla and predictable when it came to sex, so after I suggested breath play one night and he agreed I was ecstatic. I love him so much, and it’s such a rush being with somebody you trust and value in such a dangerous or harmful scenario. I get off on the irony of it alone. The first time we did it I spend the entire night awake, flush with ecstasy and pleasure. So of course we escalated, why wouldn’t we? Breath-play turned into choking, that turned into nearly losing consciousness and everything along that line.