I’ve never really liked hiking, especially far into mountain ranges, but my wife loves it so I put up with it.
We’d been planning on hiking through the Rockies for a year or so. We saved up enough to go last summer, and we did so. We said farewell to our family members, this vacation would last a month.
I wish I’d never gone.
After landing and having a motel booked, we decided that we would start the hike tomorrow because we were still both jet lagged, tired, and some other reasons I don’t need to list off.
So the day ended pretty quick. After all, we’d landed around 3:00 P.M. so there wasn’t much day to experience. We fell asleep, ready for tomorrow’s hike.
After waking up at 3:00 A.M. we watched the television they had set up in our room until breakfast opened. We walked down in our pajamas, got lots of food so we had more energy, and dined like kings. But at this point we were in a rush to start driving to our destination. It wasn’t very far, but we wanted all day to hike.
We run upstairs, change into our hiking clothes, get all our gear, etc. It probably took us only 5 minutes to be out the door and calling an Uber.
The drive was a good hour or so. It was 8:47 A.M. at this point.
So we set off. The two of us chat for a while until the subjects run dry. Then, all you can hear is my huffing and grunts.
I’ll spare you the details of the whole journey. To sum it up; my feet hurt. I tell my wife this, so she goes off ahead of me and tells me she’ll wait for me to come up when I’m ready. (Thanks, Catherine)
I sit down on a sturdy rock, examining the wildlife around me. This is when I notice it. A notebook! I scurry to pick it up because I’m a nosy little fuck, stuffing it into my backpack to read when I get home.
1:00 P.M. finally hits, we finish. We took the longest trail. Thank god!
We take another Uber back to the motel. My wife falls asleep almost instantly, and so do I at first. Then I remember the notebook. I rummage through my backpack and pull it out.
The writing is sloppy and old, but I can make-out whatever it says. After mulling over it for an hour, here’s what I think the first few pages page say.
Day 1: I Wish They Would Stop Running The most difficult part of my life is getting food. I see these prey walking through my territory. It looks like they could last me a while. Ohoho yes! I would love to feed on their dogs and sweaty skin! Their juicy meats! The thought of it makes my mouth water. But whenever I try to be friendly and get a chance to kill them they run away! I don’t have time to chase rabbits all day, just let me eat you god damn! You filthy humans think your life is more precious than mine! How I wish I could get close enough to rip your pulsing heart from your chests… you fools.
Day 2: So Close Today I got to feel the skin of one of them! I was so very much tempted to chew his leg right there and then, but he was moving much too fast for me to get a bite. It would’ve been perfect too! He was alone, all alone out here. It would have been the perfect ambush. I hope I get this lucky fortnight!
Day 3: I Am Hurt I got to bite a human today. They did not react well. After biting his leg I saw the blood rush out of it. The juicy meats inside! It was such a pleasing experience. I wish I could savor that flavor forever. But he was not as nice as I thought he would be. Oh no, for he brought out a weapon! I do not know what it was but it was loud and it hurt. The weapon fell out of me a few (time measurement I don’t understand) ago. I hope I am ok.
This next page is covered in blood and all I can see is the title.
Day 4: Please Help Me
I don’t think this thing is alive any longer. Hopefully it died, I don’t want to live on the Earth knowing some horrifying shithead like this exists.
For the love of god, bring a weapon with you while hiking into the Rockies.